Friday, February 29, 2008


It was only “Mithya” for which I visited cinema hall after a long time. Generally, my instinct easily predicts me about a movie and usually it’s always right. So that way, I was sure of watching this movie and this time in cinema.

I have liked Ranvir and Vinay since the early days MTV in India and they both have done well in this movie too ( I wish Vinay had a longer role in this movie). Mithya is very beautiful, bounding, stunning, provoking movie. Did I miss the word hilarious? Yeah, it is a comic one but there are hidden surprises.

My advice for this movie? “Just don’t miss it and find out what is real and what is Mithya in a life !”

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

'Watch' It !

In early 90’s, in my college days, I used to get my shining black Royal Enfield serviced from a particular mechanic on much disciplined schedule. He used to regard me a lot and money for his services was never an issue among us. Many times he would refuse charging me anything, many times he would ask me to keep his fee with me safe only for his emergency time and many times he would ask me (and usually would get) for some money for his ‘half’ of whisky without any account. But story I am telling today is not of that mechanic but about something else.

The ‘workshop’ of that mechanic was so small that it consists only two hand held tool kits and one stool for himself and he used to sat outside a spare parts shop. While every service I had to buy some spares from that shop and the shopkeeper was very shrewd and used to charge too much for even cheep spare taking advantage of his only shop in that area. Being an experienced bike owner, at every purchase I used to insist him for genuine prices as I was very much aware of the prices and brands of the spares but he would simply not listen to me. I never liked his attitude and always advised my mechanic to shift his place to somewhere else.

One day there was some extra repair had to be done to my bike and some parts to be replaced. In the evening, when I went to collect my bike after repairs, while settling the account of spares I noticed some prices charged unnecessarily and other too high than actual rates. Though I filed with irritation but I had decided not to say a word. While checking his hand written bill, I saw that the shopkeeper had made mistake while calculating the amount and had wrongly written lesser total than actual. The difference was of around Two hundred fifty Rupees which may sound tiny amount today but it was a decent figure in 90’s and that too for a college student like me. The wrong calculations of that shopkeeper brought a smile on my face and I thought, “Here comes the judgement day”. For a minute a sense of honesty came to my mind and impelled me to correct his mistake but my disliking for his attitude stopped me immediately and ordered me to take advantage of his mistake. I paid his lesser calculated amount to him and inside my ego was bit satisfied by giving a slap of two hundred fifty rupees to that cunning shopkeeper.

Few days later, I had to visit a marriage function of a friend in a remote village. I along some other friends drove in my car to the nearest road around 60 Km from my town and then we had to walk uphill around two kilometers above the road to reach that village. Though we reached the village easily and enjoyed the marriage party, we faced great difficulty returning back downward on that trek. Trek was too narrow and was turned very slippery cause of the fallen needles like leaves of deodar trees. Some of us slipped and fell very dangerously including me. Luckily no one was hurt badly.

Next day while getting ready for college I saw my wrist watch was missing. “I surely have dropped that watch when I fell on that trek”, I thought while rubbing a small bruise on my left wrist and after uselessly searching entire home for my watch. Damn, it was Titan Fast track and I really loved my watch. I felt too bad for the loss. All the day in the college, I remained engulfed in bad mood and kept thinking of my watch. “You tried to be very smart buddy by saving two hundred and fifty bucks, now enjoy the party, your seven hundred rupees worth watch is gone”, my conscience started bothering me now. I felt like a defeated soldier with injured body and crushed ego. I had no answer.

On the way back home from college, I stopped at the same spare parts shop and went to shopkeeper. I handed him two hundred fifty rupees and told him that I checked the total at home and found his mistake. While handing over the money to him I expected a genuine thank-you gesture from him filled with greatness towards me but that creeper showed no such sign, put the money in chest and got busy in his business. I stand there for a second and then left his counter filled with rage for him once again.

“What was the use of this stupidity”, it was now my hurt ego’s turn to drill me. “You already had lost your watch and now you have thrown more money into waste, and that too for such a thankless person. Be shrewd, man! Who gives a shit to sincerity and honesty these days? Stop acting foolish anymore now”, my ego preached me. I spent a restless night that evening.

Is the story over? For me, yes it was. I was left with a bitter lesson and an expensive one, no doubt. But still the lesson was not a clear mandate for me. Even then I was not sure who won that battle of ego and conscience. My conscience kept assuring me that I should have return his money unaffected by his attitude or thanklessness and on the other hand my brain kept suggesting me that when he never gave a fair deal to you how come he deserve a fair deal from you? Loosing the watch was just a coincident.

It was the day, when my friend visited my home back from his village after his marriage. He brought sweets for my family members and for me, he had something special. My fast track. One of the guests in their function spotted the watch and asked everyone present there. My friend recognized that it was mine and brought it back.

I smiled from the depth of my heart. And someone else was smiling too, 'my conscience'.

Thursday, February 7, 2008

How to be Logical ?

Why do we dream? Why do we desire?

Dreaming and desiring for the expensive most cars or a beautiful private beach house on the world's best exotic locations is understandable and also achievable today or tomorrow but desiring for moon or stars? Is it sheer stupidity to dream for stars? (Here mentioning moon & stars I meant by almost impossible targets) Is this is immature and childish act? Do mature people not dream or desire? Whom to listen, heart or brain? Or can anyone decide and select the ratio of advice to be adopted from both of heart and brain? R says, "We need to grow up" and I am asking the same question, " Don't grown ups have dreams in the layers of their aged, experienced and matured hearts”? I think only the depth and area changes among an adult and child's dream and rest remains the same. Even when we know that no one on this earth can own moon but still we dream and desire and imagine.

Is it possible to be calculative or to be logical always? Without dreaming or imagination can we last long on this planet as a human? I think that is one of the various factors which creates difference among human and animal heart. The fight of brain and heart is always there. But whom do we listen? A wallet full of money lying unattended on the road spotted by us could buy some happiness, but we listen to our heart who says this is not your.

I wonder how people can divert their mind and heart. I simply can't. I find this very difficult to lure my thoughts from the point it has stuck to some other point.

The Gopies of Varindavan had heavenly affection for Shri Krishan and when Lord shifted to Dawarika for states affairs, in his absence all the Gopies fell down to gloom and heart brokenness. Hearing this, Krishana sent his courtier and friend Udhav to make Gopies understand. Udhav tried to convince Gopies telling them that country and society need Lord more than Gopies and that now Gopies should divert their minds to somewhere else. Then sad and furious Gopies replied to Udhav in the words filled with pain, उद्धव, मन ना भयो दस बीस, एक हो सो गयो श्याम संग, को आराधे ईस ।

So tell me my heart, what to do now?

Monday, February 4, 2008

Ram Sethu

Really adorable song !


Long time back a friend said to me, “Every human heart is an ocean, you never know what’s hidden in the deepest depth down there.”

Sankar in Chowringhee have written about some of such oceans who came across his life while he was working as a receptionist in one of the then most luxurious Hotel Shahjahan in the area of Chowringhee in Calcutta. Originally written and published in Bangla in 1962, I read its English version by Arunava Sinha.

Catching reader’s interest from very first page, ‘Chowringhee’, contains so much of human lives roaming around this very hotel as its employees or guests. Shankar a former clerk of an English barrister and then a door to door waste bin salesman and finally a receptionist at Shahjahan, found himself touched and moved by complicated webs of desires, dreams, lust, greed, grief, pleasure and affection of the various human beings affiliated to his glitzy hotel of metropolitan. The hotel manager Marco Polo, senior receptionist Satta Bose, cabaret dancer and her companion, hostess Karabi Guha, linen in charge Nityahari, Bar in charge, a private detective, Doctor Sutherland, Musician PK Gomez, film stars, celebrities, social workers, businessmen, company personals, politicians and every person in this book has his/her own story to narrate. Every heart in this novel is an ocean carrying countless hidden treasures and even unpleasant filth.

How much a human heart can take on? I think there is no limit. The state of mind I was going through when I started this novel, I think the stories of the lives of the characters in this book boosted my courage to face my problems with more strong heartedly.

Sunday, February 3, 2008

Help Me Prabhu !

Hurdles, hurdles and more hurdles. Nothing seems to be working in my favour past many months. Every this and that, which I had expected to be gone through smoothly for me, have been flown into ashes in front of my eyes. Problems and failures are like chasing and then embracing me with full force.

If I have to glance through positive lenses, there are few achievements too but I know there were some certain, sure shot & essential successes which blasted off on my face hurting me inside badly. Everybody seems to be on opposite side. And this is not at all an illusion. I have seen with my own eyes and heard with my own ears. Number of unforeseen and unexpected barriers has mushroomed in my way forcing me to change the route. But all the routs seem to be closed for me as off now. I have already faced a lot and I have no idea how much more is still waiting.

But here I wanna pat my back also. I have faced all the problems while standing tall and not kneeling down. I know I am alone standing against all the odds and there are couples of eyes watching me with their faiths and hopes to see me merging out as a winner. There are few who have prayed for me. I know I am not going to loose their faith. I will not let problems take me over. I still have so much of courage left to face these and much more if any. I won’t lie down, I won’t break and I won’t give up. All these problems are going to make me more strong and more powerful. That is for sure.

Just help me Shri Prabhu!