Sunday, December 31, 2006

Celebrations of Civilized Society!

Another evening of celebration, It’s 31st December, how to celebrate? Let’s go to Shimla. Five friends, one car, six bottles of whisky, dozen packets of potato chips & peanuts and ear bursting music, that’s all you need. Start around noon from Chandigarh. The rule is that you must take at least two large shots before you leave the city limits.

Now drive as carelessly as you can. Don’t give a damn to other vehicles on the road, people should feel panic when they see your car leaping towards them. Put the music so loudly that one should hear it from a kilometer away, it does not matter if you could not get a single word of the song yourself. Soon you will find traffic blockage because hundreds of other cars are also on the way to hills for the celebrations but don’t stop your vehicle at the end of queue waiting for traffic to clear. Just keep honking the horn and drive as far as you can. This will make the traffic worse but that’s not our headache. Traffic constable will shout at you but he won’t have other choice than to give you way as there are thousands of vehicle stranded on the road.

A bottle is empty but don’t waste your time looking for bin, just toss the bottle on the road. The crashing sound of glass on the hard road gives more thrills sometimes. Someone may get injured of the broken glass but we don’t have time to think about this. Keep looking for girls, ladies (regardless of age) on the road or the vehicles passing by, if you don’t pass dirty comments on them, the evening is a waste.

Soon the alcohol will start taking control and we will start loosing control on ourselves. If we will be lucky we will reach Shimla alive and without any accident. No need to mention small brawl with local shopkeeper midway.

It would be dark by the time we reach The Mall Road, time for real fun. Start drinking more and more and dance on the music. Yeah this is real life. There are honeymooners too. Try to get physical with ladies. You are the king tonight nobody can stop you. Some stupid people are middle class, they call the police if someone is flirting with their ladies. Poor fellow now have to pay all the cash of his pocket to police and spent the night in lock up. The other one is beaten by the local guys. But that’s the real adventure we are here for, man!

Oh now its time for a nice vomit. Don’t worry do it anywhere on the road, your clothes may stink with the fluid you are vomiting but in this condition you will never realize. Look at that guy there he don’t even know that he is laying in his own pee.

Yahooooo !! Someone is telling that its New year now. Another hour of dancing, drinking, vomiting, peeing in the middle of the road and then punches from other tourists. (May be you were abusive you don’t remember.)

Okay friends, its 2'o clock in the morning and after hours of dancing and vomiting you may feel hungry and tired. But what is this, nothing is available to eat anywhere. Even the cheap dhaba owner is selling simple bread for hundred bucks. Drinking water is not available. The cold is killing, need a shelter but all the hotels are booked. Not even a single room is available. Some tourists are knocking the doors of locals but no one letting them in. They look at us like we are rotten cockroaches. People are lying here and there. Many are sleeping is their cars. Headache, cold, hunger, and bruises are reminding of hell. You will have to pass the remaining night in the car but someone has broken all the glasses and stole the stereo. Kill the night somehow. One of the friends is badly sick but we don’t even have proper clothes to beat the icy wind. Burn the spare tire for heat if you wanna stay alive.

Thank god, it is morning at last. Morning of 1st January, first day of New Year. But damn where were we sleeping in the night? We are stinking, clothes are torn, car is crushed from all the sides and we have lost all the money and valuables. A stray dog was lying in between us. One of our friend is missing, may be he was taken away by the police we don’t remember.

But don’t worry, we had fun. We celebrated the New Year at Shimla. “Happy New Year, Folks. Wish you a great start of the year.”

3 comments:

Unknown said...

Yes it is common. Though I haven't even done the same way, as I have never drunk, But I have seen my friends doing some of it.

But very well expressed, Gaurav. It was like all happening in front of my eyes.

Praney ! said...

Be assured Manish, neither I have ever done that way cause i have never drunk too.
But staying Shimla for ten years gives you no other choice than to be every year witness of such celebrations.

Unknown said...

The ironical expression of your post was evidence enough. It was plain that you never did :-)